Wisdom Council

DR. MICHAEL O'SHAY

HOW DOES WORRY AFFECT YOU AND OTHERS?

Let's define worry as: to annoy or bother; to make troubled or uneasy; to be anxious.  That's sounds pretty much correct from what we can see.  Somewhere in a past life you picked up the belief that if you worried about something or someone it helps them or you avoid that situation.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  In fact you are sending them the nastiest ugly stuff that's designed to actually create the very thing you want avoid happen.  The reason for that is your mind does not understand that you DON'T what that to happen.  It only sees and hears the words and pictures.  Consequently its job is to create what you are thinking and saying.  If you want a visual to use worry is like sending a nasty, black, slimy glob of thoughts and energies which end up sitting in that person you love and comes back to you even stronger. 

Now that we've defined worry you might ask what's an alternative ?  I would tell you OBSERVE is much better and more productive.  Let's say the definition of observe is to notice something or pay special attention to it or come to a conclusion.  Now that's different because 1) you aren't in the emotions, 2) you aren't sending fear with your thoughts, 3) you can actually see and create much easier what you really want.  Let's say you're just observing a football game and aren't really invested in the outcome.  Your reactions and observations would look very different from someone who had a loved one on that team or are loyal to that team.   

Now we totally understand that this worry thing got so incorporated into your whole lifestyle and thought process it's hard to stop it.  So let's take a small test to see just how much worry has crept into your life.  Rate the items listed below that you tend to worry about the most on a scale of 1-10.  If you don't worry at all use  1. If you worry some use a 5.  If you worry a lot about this use a 10.  Answer this based on how much worrying you've done within the last year.  Be honest with yourself if you really want to get something from this.

 

Finances (all finances and usually means lack of)

 

Relationships (means involvement with immediate family)

 

Relationships (how much do you worry about coworkers, friends, etc)

 

Health (health problems, issues or diseases for your and others)

 

Your home (keeping it, safety of it, repairs or renovate)

 

Your Pet or pets (their physical health, happiness, safety)

 

Someone or something hurting, disabling, or even killing you (How often do you have thoughts of being hurt, robbed or murdered)

 

Career/job (worry about keeping it, finding another one, people in the job you work with, approval from superiors, making ends meet)

 

Bills (keeping a place to live and utilities, food, clothes, credit cards)

 

The fate and condition of the world (Is the world falling into a big hole? Do people no longer care?)

 

What people think about you (Do they love you? Do they talk about your appearances, clothes, habits?)

 

Cars/transportation (having a new one, keep an older one, insurance, repairs)

 

Vacation (yes they are stressful.  Will you have the money? Will you have a great time?)

 

Other things (list other things not mentioned)

 

Total Score

Are you surprised at your score?  Do you worry more than you realized?

It's interesting that the stress that goes along with worry can create illness in your body because it reduces the effectiveness of your immune system.  So let's look at your scores.  If your score is under 10 you're holding your own.  If it's 10-13 you are susceptible to getting a cold.  If it's 13-20 you will probably get sick with the flue or something that keeps you in bed or justifies a trip to the doctors.  If it's above 20 there's a good chance you are creating something much stronger inside your body (disease) as your systems cannot work efficiently with this much stress and worry.

How do you stop this worrying?
Now that you've seen what nasty stuff worry is like and how you have ingrained in your thoughts the next question would be, "How do I stop this?"

Here are some suggestions:

  1. Recognize that you're doing it.  This pulls it out of your stream of consciousness and allows you to take back control over it.  Create a symbol for worry that would stick in your thoughts such as human sludge or things you would find at a garbage dump.
  2. Pull it back to you.  Take it back which means you want to pull it from and off the person or situation you've sent it to.  Don't re-absorb it though.  Instead roll it into a ball and hand it over to angels or other higher beings.  They know what do to with it.
  3. Determine how long you've been worrying about this.  This will determine how important and ingrained it is in your life and thoughts. It also gives you a chance to see (if you're honest) that your worrying has not made the situation any better at all.  So that belief is not working.
  4. Ask yourself the three questions:
    a) Was I observing or worrying?
    b) Has my worrying changed anything, i.e. made it worse or better?
    c) Why did I need to do that in the first place? What is the real fear here?
  5. Once you've answered the questions and have answers, simply replace the original thought of worry with the outcome you truly wanted to create and remove the worry from your head and body.

This won't happen in a day or a week but the more you try this the stronger you become and discover that creating what you really want is so much better than worrying about those things you have little control over.  You can actually feel better and have more fun in life once you release the need to worry. 

 

B.J. WALL, MA, INC
THE MICHAEL INSTITUTE

P.O. Box 1943
Ashland, VA 23005

(804) 746-1149

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